The day has been okay. I saw the doctor today and asked him about traveling for Christmas, I am not going very far, but still. He said it would probably be alright mostly because they are just trying to keep me from doing too much activity, and it would just be riding in a car, I just need to make sure I don't do too much while I am away. Which shouldn't be a problem as my family is more than understanding of keeping this baby in as long as possible. So I have an appointment on Thursday, December 24th Yep... Christmas Eve. He wants to check me before I go anywhere; I can only go if I haven't dilated. I am hoping to make plans and change them as I need to rather than have everything up in the air. In fact I decided that if someone has a problem with that then we won't spend any time with them for Christmas no matter what happens if the baby comes, if I can't travel, if it doesn't come, if I can travel; whatever.
Before RuthAnne left us for a week or so it only took about 15 minutes to be with her at night, and I could leave her awake. Well now, I sat with her for 30 minutes and my mom sat with her for 45 after that; staying till she fell asleep. It made me frustrated. The doctor made a joke about how being on bed rest and all that has been happening was probably just torturing me at this point. I laughed a little, because it was funny. But I thought about it a little more and it really is. Then when I thought about what was happening with RuthAnne I realized that with the way my life goes this baby is going to come at exactly 37 weeks; for a few reasons. 1: That will be January 3rd and just after being able to write it off on our taxes. 2: Then all of this won't have been worth it. RuthAnne's life being turned upside down, mine because of the bed rest, and now with her being all messed up. Plus my mom and Isaac. I am getting frustrated with everything and everyone for different reasons and all I want to do is cry. There are other things but they probably won't make any sense so I won't bring them up.. at least right now... maybe some other time. For now I have to go to sleep because I am exhausted.
4 years ago today my Gram Murray passed away. I love her and I miss her.
GB ~The Woodwards